19 December - Be Attentive to Others

Mindful Calendar Activity

From close family members to the neighbour whose name you can’t quite remember, Christmas often acts as an instigator for social interaction. There are more conversations, more small talk, more moments shared — sometimes out of habit rather than intention.

Next time you stop for a chat, try not to simply go through the motions. Instead, make it a more fulfilling experience by keeping the following two points in mind:

1. Make eye contact.Try to really see the person you’re talking to — their expressions, their mannerisms, and how they are engaging with you. Eye contact helps ground the interaction and shows genuine presence and respect.

2. Practise mindful listening.Truly listen to what the other person is saying. Don’t just wait for your turn to speak, don’t try to anticipate their next sentence, and don’t worry about what you’re going to say in response. Simply listen first, then react. See where the conversation naturally takes you.

Your conversations may feel a little slower, but they are likely to become more thoughtful and meaningful too. You won’t remember to practise this for every interaction — and that’s okay. If you catch yourself drifting, just try again with the next conversation.

This simple exercise can help you appreciate both your interactions and the people around you far more, instead of auto-piloting your way through them.

Reflection – Putting It Into Practice

Today gave me a few opportunities to put this activity into practice — with mixed results.

I saw one neighbour about 25 metres away. We waved at each other and kept going. I was caught off guard, and I was also rushing to make it to the shops and back in time to prepare dinner. In that moment, I wasn’t ready for more — and that’s okay. Noticing it is part of the learning.

I also met two new ladies while working today. We shared a warm introduction, learned each other’s names, and kept the conversation light-hearted and appropriate. That felt good — simple, genuine, and easy.

With my children, though, I didn’t do so well. I’ll admit that. They needed my full attention, but my mind was elsewhere — focused on how to get dinner ready on time. Presence slipped away.

This reflection ties in with something I heard on the radio: a reminder for parents to ditch their phones over Christmas. Not only to spend better quality time with their children, but also to set a good example. Our children learn how to connect by watching us, and choosing presence over screens shows them what meaningful social interaction looks like.

Today alone, there were countless messages across various WhatsApp groups — suddenly everything and anything related to school reports felt urgent. I’m trying to step back from that noise and focus instead on the family WhatsApp group — the one concerned with planning Christmas meals, shared moments, and time together.

I wonder if many of us feel the pull to live without our phones, at least for part of Christmas. The constant stream of messages can become overwhelming — especially when they come from people who once sent cards, or who no longer do. What was once slower and more intentional can start to feel like background noise, demanding attention rather than offering connection.

Perhaps this Christmas is an opportunity to choose quality over quantity — in our conversations, our time, and our presence.

In fact, I’ve just realised there’s one more card I should write, rather than sending a text on Christmas Eve. A small gesture, perhaps, but one that feels more intentional — and very much in keeping with the spirit I’m trying to practise.

Presence doesn’t have to be perfect.It just has to be intentional.